Lunar Moth Self-Portrait

oil on panel, 36" x 42"

I seem to be on a roll with the self-portraits. This one owes a lot to the use of the tablet as a tool to reconstruct an image. It adds to the content of the Lunar Moth digital image from last week's post. I like that the moth looks like it just flew through my head, but is also a part of my head. Art that addresses spirituality has to love the ephemeral. It is painted in a way that combines technical control and loose brushwork. Modern dance has that precison of form combined with improvisation and visceral movement. Something about the flatness and division of shapes remind me of Mondrian, who was very exacting and painted to jazz.

I had an uncle who was an artist who has always been my role-model on how to live. When I was a little girl, he grabbed the brass rings for me while I rode on the carousel. He also gave me a tiny, gold ring when I was a baby. Those gold rings coming out of my head symbolize the people who have died who have made an impact on my life. "Grab the golden ring" is a "carpe diem" equivalent for me, but here it also suggests holding onto what is impossible to touch.

There is a large contrast between this new self-portrait and Self-Portrait Stepping Over a Threshold. Coming back home after the show in NYC, where I returned to family, friends, and my routine (including making art for the love of it), brought me back to center. It is a self-confident self-portrait. I also hope to be a positive person for others, as they are for me. There is a second way of looking at the head, if one follows the white curve on the left as the back of the head. It reminds me of "the man in the moon." Also in the fairy-tale vein, the head, end of the moth, and the manner that they are painted resemble an illuminated letter "Q", a cirle and tail. The "Q" would be for "queen" (not how I feel when I am cleaning the bathrooms), a metaphor for a strong sense of self (perhaps artistic self), solidity, autonomy. I've been interested in doing some things with crowns as spin-offs of the gold rings.

The painting was completed as the news came in regarding the Democrats taking the House, leading in the Senate, and Rumsfeld resigning. This change in government along with new innersoles gives me an extra bounce at Jazzercise and makes it feel as if Christmas has come early.

The moth wings also make for some funky sunglasses.